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Snake Eyes

Okay, so this movie made me wish I could turn back time and get my $25 back and 2 hours.

The storyline was convoluted, the acting was hammy. The editing was atrocious.

The fight scenes may have been the best thing in this movie if you could have seen the motherfuckas. The cameraman must have been slipping on ice and struggling to keep his balance during each scene.

The shaky cam was not just overused, it was abused. I think it should file a restraining order against this cameraman and director. We must protect Shaky Cam from these assholes!

Then to top it off, it was hard to see scenes filmed at night. Bad lighting.

Ugh, the movie needs its ass whooped!

FINAL VERDICT: GUILTY!!! How damn dare you show your face in my courtroom acting like you deserve to be considered a film. Shame on you, to misuse the sexiness of Henry Golding! That hairstyle was a crime in and of itself! I sentence you to 10 years hard labor in a maximum security movie prison. I hope your cell mate is that insufferable bastard, Mile 22.

Bailiff, get this piece of motion sickness inducing carnage out of my sight!

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Taina Welch
Taina Welch
Oct 06, 2021

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